Full-time and handshakes. A little Tears for Fears tinkles over the public address system. Beyond that … what, exactly? How to describe this swirling, velvety anti-noise? The sound of no gloves clapping? The sound of time physically disappearing down a vortex? The sound of no emotions?

It began with North London Forever and by the end we felt as though we had been in north London for ever: stuck on an endless loop of William Saliba passing to Jurriën Timber, of Virgil van Dijk pausing as he tried to bait a press that would never come. Long periods of this game were played at literal walking pace.

Of course it was taut and tactically engaging in parts. No game with this many good footballers in it can be truly boring. Conor Bradley tried a nice lob. Bukayo Saka whizzed and turned on the right wing. At the same time, it all had the curious side-effect of getting everybody jazzed for MK Dons v Oxford in the FA Cup third round on Friday night.

And for Liverpool, this was surely the point. In a way, this was a masterclass in how to play the league leaders away from home with...